My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
