Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
