im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
