At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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