Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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