i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Randomize
