Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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