are you still at the devil's house?
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize
