i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
