No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
a search helicopter?!
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
