Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
honey bunches of taint.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
