he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
