So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
