Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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