Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Randomize
