I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Randomize
