Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
