remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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