As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
