Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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