i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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