and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
