I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
