Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I just threw up on my dentist
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
