He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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