my sisters under your porch take her home
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
