I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
In other news, I just burned my penis
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
