piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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