nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
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