I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
