i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
