Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I'm getting married
To pizza
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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