I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
