woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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