White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
