Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
