Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
