I think I just saw someone hide a body.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
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