Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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