How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
