he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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