accomplished twins. life is a go
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
