I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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