he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
