kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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