what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Randomize
