I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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