she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
