The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
