Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
