i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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